Nothing Else Matters

Annyeong! Must admit I purportedly posted this particular blog post a few days ago. My apologies, it has been a busy week at the offi ce. How are yoy guys doing?

In the past few weeks, I’ve noticed the very core of what the cliche-but-true, “There are people who will come into your life that would change you the way you are.” Since I got bullied many times before, I used to be excessively appreciative too much on people I hold dearly to the point of giving everything even though they came off not worthy of all the effort and whatnot.

A couple of weeks ago, a random guy approached me while I’m killing the time at the mall. But of course, I didn’t entertain him since I know how dangerous it is to meddle with strangers these days. And I’ve been there before. Trusting someone I just met who’s a total stranger which I thought was real but left in an instant so he turned out to be just a waste of time and effort.

Suffice to say, you really have to be careful and know the person first before pouring yourself out to avoid crying over spilled coffee. You can’t just go over meet someone for the first time and next thing you know, that person knows everything about you. Furthermore, we should always know who and who not to meddle yourselves with (at least not too quick, wait for the right time, just in case).

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Annyeong! It’s the last month of the year and few days from now, we’re gonna have the privilege to celebrate our Savior’s birth. And I just realized that it really pays to have a close and intimate relationship with God.

I’ve been praying a million times everyday for me to have a job again and promised God, this time I will give my 100% best and I’m constantly praying that I would receive it before 2016 ends. By His unchanging grace, I was blessed by a new one last Thursday and a couple of days ago, I already got hired officially.

In relation to the title of this post, it came to my thought in the past few weeks something about not rushing things when it comes to finding the right person you’re gonna spend the rest of your life with, which I didn’t decipher way back. I used to question God why am I used to be always the one without a partner in my group of friends back in college.

Recently, I convened the reality that you don’t just pour your entirety on whoever comes along just because you’ve been waiting for it to happen. Don’t settle for whoever comes along your way like 11:11 which some people wait each day believing if they mutter their wish on that time, it will happen.You really have to wait for the right person to come along. Someone who’s worth all your entirety and would love you beyond your imperfections.

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#AllyTurns22

Oh hi lovely people! Funny as it seems, it’s actually friday the 13th today, it’s payday and yeah, it’s my birthday, as well. And so, I’m not that sure if we can go somewhere to eat. We’re actually planning to paint the town red at Sambo Kojin but then, I bet there are lots of people in there. So I think we’re gonna buy food outside and celebrate for the meantime at home. And Sambo Kojin would most probably be on the 15th after church. And as for my officemates, well.. perhaps, I will buy a giant pizza for everyone to be zany of and treat my closest friend/s somewhere.

Anyhow, as I grow a year older today, I came to a steadfast decision to abide with an action plan towards self betterment. Here’s some of it:

Now that I’m 22, I will.. focus and divert my attention things and people that will help and motivate me to put my best foot forward in everything I will do.

Now that I’m 22, I will.. love myself more and no matter how hard it may be, I will move forward and let go of those people who didn’t even hesitate to leave me behind.

Now that I’m 22, I will.. make sure to be adnascent and not complascent with what I have right now and vouch for more blessings and miracles to take place in my life as I go further.

On the contrary..

Now that I’m 22, I will not.. let myself be stuck on things that won’t contribute on self growth and people who don’t intend to stay long and came just to filter negativity on my heart.

Now that I’m 22, I will not.. allow fear take over me in times of despair but trust that God will never leave me whatever happens.

Now that I’m 22, I will not.. waste my time forcing myself for people to value me as much as I value them. If you don’t want me in your life, and so be it. I will never be that girl who will force you to stay over and over again and beg for your attention like a lame dog.

Having said these, I really hope and pray this year will be a year of continuous learning, growth and blessings will overflow as I turn a year older and the fact that I’m not a teenager anymore, for real. Yeah right. 🙂

Fear Not

Oh hi! Some of you might be surprised as to why it seems like I’ve been active with my SNS lately. Well, let’s say something went wrong with my work and with that, I’ve been applying to various companies this week. Suffice to say, I feel like I’m in a roller-coaster of mixed emotions as of the moment. I’m trying to keep myself composed and positive as much as possible. Pulling off my best actress mask as much as I can. Although truth be told, it’s draining and tiring like zany. 😦 But what I always do is trust on God’s will and plan for my life.

Because I was so weak and frail back in the days when I was a rebel who just do whatever she felt like doing. And I’m pretty sure if I stayed that way today, I bet I already commited suicide. Growing up, with everything that I’ve been through in life, I can say that I changed in a way I don’t expect myself to be. With God as my refuge and secure fortress, together with what I learned from the hefty amount of pain, failures and rejection I’ve encountered in the past, I can say that I’m absolutely not the same as what I am before. I may not say that I’ve able to overcome my insecurities that the past has caused me but I can say, I’m stronger and wiser now. Not letting life’s big rocks stoop me down just like that.

I believe and proclaim that God would make a way for me to be hired with the best company and job wherein I would build a long-term career and would help me grow as a person. And later on, be able to pursue and fulfill my dreams and goals in life. For this look, it was taken at the National Museum a couple of weeks ago when I had a date with my brother-photographer. Wanting to channel that girl who finds comfort in art and being that girl of mysteries look, here’s what I wore:

Skirt & Shoes from H&M | Leggings from Claire’s

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Stronger Than You Know

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Hello there! How are you guys doing? Pat on the back, I’m staying true to my goal of making up for the late posts I’ve convened recently.

Anyhow, dealing with the diverse changes that’s been taking place in my life now (I’ve mentioned it on my previous posts) and after I’ve internalized and had the time to process things that happened before, it made me realize how important it is to be wise and careful with the people you’re gonna invest into and who you must disregard and let go.

Like for instance, would you go for a friend who’s with you everyday but when trial comes or when you need someone to help you process your thoughts and weigh things that bother you, you can’t count on her/him? Or would you rather go with someone you don’t get to meet and be with everyday/frequently but you can always (like, always!) count on them whenever you need someone to talk to and they can always help you with anything? Truth be told, I would go with the latter. I have friends like that who I seldom meet but with just one click, they always put up with anything under the sun.

On the other hand, would you opt for a guy/girl who let’s say, excels on the same field of study as yours and you guys have the same fixation on many things but seems immature on certain things and doesn’t know yet what it’s like to be in a relationship and how to treat girls/guys right? Or would you go for someone who’s not fond of some of the things that you enjoy and used to doing (for example, he’s not fond of hanging out just as you do) and you sometimes find him/her too matured than you are right now but he/she helps you how to overcome those doubts and insecurities you have inside you, he/she knows how to handle relationships and he/she brings out the best in you?

My point is, we have to ascertain who are the ones who deserve to stay in our lives and the ones who don’t even deserve even an inch of us. Who to keep and who to discard before you develop an incredible attachment on someone and it’s too late to back out. Comprehending this after 21 years of living here on earth screams “Don’t be so shallow and stupid! Use your brain!” Suffice to say, we should act according on what we know rather than on what we feel. Don’t let your emotions manipulate your decisions wholly. Make sure you don’t let anyone take you for granted like I did before.

Upon speaking of maturity, it’s very timely that I’m wearing an vintage-y statement shirt like this. Teehee! 😉 And this particular look shows my present color palette nowadays which to be honest, I think will somehow change as I enter the business world and bid farewell to my school uniform. Aww! *mixed emotions*

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Bowler Hat & Ribbon Cuff from H&M | Statement Shirt from Artwork | Watch from Swatch

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Everyone’s Got Something

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Ohayu gozaimasu! How are you guys doing? Sorry for being inactive for the past couple of weeks. Well, I must say that things are really shifting and change is taking place in alost all facets of my life. My graduation was held last Friday at PICC Plenary Hall (Stay tuned for my blog post about that big day I had this week!) and I already start the ball rolling with regards to job hunting online such as at Job Street and JobsDB.

It felt like it all came so fast and next thing I know, the girl who just read the newspaper and head straight to the entertainment section and nothing else turned to a graduating student who never want to waste time after finishing college with that, looks forward to job fairs and go directly to the classified ads in the newspaper.
Just to be candid, I used to be the happy-go-lucky type who doesn’t take life too seriously. I was the unmotivated one and everything was all fun and games to me. Before.

In just a snap, I became the hungry for success type. The one who aims to find a job (a stable one, hopefully!) right after college. Maybe it’s all because of my insecurities that made me to a person I’m today. To all those people who belittled and underestimated me that’s pushing me to do better and attain the success I’m yearning for.
In order for me to prove all those people wrong for not believing in me and which later on made me not to believe in myself as well. For my insecurities to vanish into thin air and when the wind comes swirling back to me, all of it would turn into confidence and the heart that has been torn would finally meet its sunshine.

As for this look, it was what I wore during our second day in Baguio last month. Yes, last month. I know my day 2 & 3 travel diary was immensely overdue. And please forgive me for being late on posting it due to my preparation for graduation and stuff. And I sincerely promise that I would be posting the Baguio | Day 2 tomorrow. Back to the actual look, this came a bit of a surprise to me. Since I originally planned of pairing my oversized checkered shirt dress with my black skater skirt instead of my violet-marsala skirt. Due to my comfort-over-style rule, I decided to wear the marsala one then. Because there would never be an excuse with conforming to what you think will look lovely on the outside but deep inside you, you’re not genuinely comfortable on what you’re wearing, right?

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More photos of this look on tomorrow’s day 2 of my Baguio travel diary. Stay tuned!

A Message to All Graduates

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My shameless selfie slash OOTD says, Hello! 🙂 That was from yesterday’s Graduates’ Banquet at our church. Business professionals from a church and our head pastor doled out some life lessons, advices and thoughts to ponder for us to be roused to work hard as we enter the corporate world. Free meals and ESV bible were given out as well. (My favorite food choices among the food catering were included here.)

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(c) Jurry Flores & Cathedral of Praise 🙂

As I set off to attend the disclosed event, I made sure that I would not depart without attaining new knowledge and heap various thoughts to ponder in order for me to be primed with transitioning from a student to a professional as I cross the threshold of the corporate world.

One thing we are to be acquainted with is that every foundation in our lives are all on the process of change. We are given the free will to decide for ourselves. Therefore, we are to choose the path we will take wisely. Facts are no longer relevant. Wisdom is.

We are ought to fathom that everything’s gonna change. Except for God. He will never ever change. And we are thought that we have to learn how to play into our strength. The harder we work, the more God will bless us. After all, as what it is avowed in Proverbs 14:23, all hard work brings profit but mere talk leads only to poverty.

We should always come early, go home late and converge ourselves with working hard. It was said that when you have reputation of being a hard worker, many companies will go after you. And we have to show off on time always.

What do you prefer? Slow or quick success? If we covet the quick one, we are to examine our steps and take the steps that are firm. (Proverbs 4:26). We are to find a job that we know we would enjoy carrying out. For if you hate your job, what’s the purpose of doing so then? If you screw up, never hesitate to apologize. For it shows that you’re growing and learning. We shouldn’t let ourselves commit the same mistakes again and again. And that applies in every facet of our lives.

Run On Love

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Oh hello! After all the lazy hazy mood or festive shenanigans we revel ourselves into, classes & work resumed. But due to the Pope’s visit here in the Philippines, all of us enjoyed an extended super long vacay. As for me, since I only have classes during MWF, I had a 6-day vacay. And in the past few days, the harsh reality came crashing in front of me – again.

I would admit that I tend to be pasaway and you know the feeling when the cliché “the truth hurts” and “the truth will set you free” slaps you right in the face to wake you up from something you can’t escape from. Some of us, or should I say, most of us refuse to face the reality and tend to fool ourselves with what we choose to believe which is basically a lie. Truth be told, I’ve been like that for a long time just recently.
So I ended up finding it hard even more to let go of people who doesn’t even deserve to be an issue in my life. That the ones who I invest too much effort, feelings & time are the same people who don’t even exert effort & take me seriously just like how I do to them. If some of you regularly read my blog posts, I know I already have heaps of posts about moving on & stuff. It’s not that easy to move on and they say there’s no formula for that.

But of course, if there’s a will, there’s a way. After all, it’s not my loss. It’s his. Ensuing on with today’s look, as we grow up, we tend to change our style preference, right? As for me, at first, I prefer the print on print formula and leggings that in my opinion now is too mainstream already. I go for the basic ones and dark hues which goes something like this:

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Bowler Hat & Skirt from H&M | Tights from Claire’s | Boots from Doc Martens

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I Like You

Annyeong! How are you guys doing? I had my birthday celebrated a couple of days ago. And we chose to eat dinner at Yakimix. At first, the latter had a constant dispute with Vikings Luxury Buffet. But the former reigned and of course, it made our tummies zany and came home with a dozen of donuts to munch the next day. Apparently, truth be told, I had my pre-birthday celebration last November 8 with my favorite auntie & brother where we also witnessed the ever fluffy, marshmallow-like, super adorbs Baymax courtesy of Big Hero 6 at Powerplant Cinemas, had two doses of TCB during the day and took the 12-inch Mighty Ton burger & huge milkshake, The Milky Way at The Porch by Casa Verde.

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On the other hand, turning 21 was like a total different story for me. (OMG! I feel old already! *hides face*) Late at night, when we reached home, I came up with divergent realizations as to what the past year taught me. In my relationships with people, in particular. Maybe some of you might find me sensitive or whatsoever. (some of you who follows & reads my posts everytime/most of the time, if there’s any) But I’m just expressing my thoughts & feelings. Nothing’s wrong with staying true to ourselves, right? That’s better rather than pretending something you’re not.

In relation to that, facing and accepting the truth is better than making yourself believe on things that you want to perceive as the truth but you know there were all just lies. Like for example, you’re making yourself believe that someone you love will love you back someday. But the truth is, you know that person won’t. To be blunt with you, I experienced that just recently. If some of you read my previous posts you’ll understand well what I’ve been through with a certain guy (somehow). Having said that, it led me to another realization that we should not force things to happen that are not meant to be. Or else, reality will come & slap you right in the face with the truth. One thing I learned with all the excessive heartbreaks that I’ve encountered in the past (especially with a certain guy) is that we should not put our guards down way too fast & trust people just like that. For almost everything in this world is temporary. Including people and their feelings. A lot of guys out there may come into your life and make you feel you’re special to them. But only one of them, in the right time, are meant to stay in your life forever. So we should not make decisions just like that without thinking of the million possibilities that may happen afterwards. Expectations might kill you alive.

Personally, I’ve encountered those A LOT. People letting me down after all I’ve done for them and stuff. Oh please, I had too much. Then it hit me, why would I let me lose myself trying to hold on to people who don’t even care nor afraid of losing me? Reality taught me that, by the way. So we should open our eyes with what’s real rather than drowning ourselves with things that we just want to believe in. On the other hand, being a K-pop fangirl for the past few years, I must say, it translates on what I opt to wear. After all, as the cliche puts it, we are what we wear, isn’t?

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Bowler Hat from H&M | Watch from Swatch 

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Love Came Down

Well, summer is about to end. And since I’m just laying around le house, well.. I’m currently uhmm.. feeling that my insecurities are taking over and filling up and yes. I know, as a Christian, I may sound like I’m not thankful and it’s like I’m underestimating how He created me. Multifarious of you might not understand where I’m coming from and why I’m acting this way.

Well, to cut the story short, since when I was in second grade back then, I was bullied until I graduated from HS, this had gone on and on and on. Furthermore, this caused me to question myself and God, as well. On why did my life turned out like this. Why do I need to run after people just for them to notice and appreciate me. Just for them not to leave me alone. Divergent thoughts hurled into my mind as everybody criticize me and underestimate my weaknesses and capabilities. As I experienced being hated, disgusted and a laughing stock among our section and excessively deceived by the guys I used to adorn. Did things a girl don’t normally do for a guy that should be in the other way around. And on that specific phase of my life, I was so weak, have no one to turn to and feel like giving up.

And now, though the bullying had finally stopped, I still experience being the less liked among our clique at times, being ignored by the people I love that resulted fo me to look like a lame dog running after people just for them to notice and appreciate me and many more.

But then, how was I different from before? Well, as what I’ve mentioned before, I was a born again Christian, right? Before, I must say, I’m much of a Pseudo-Christian. Christian by name but acts like an unbeliever. However, after I undergone a one year bible college/training on our church back in 2010, I was enlightened and divulged with the goodness of our Most High. O:)

I waded through the fact that when faced with trials and when we flick through bad times, when we seek His face and let our souls be filled with His word, then we already have a weapon against trials! ( Ephesians 6:17- Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.) And when we do, we will blessed in everything we do. (James 1:25- But the man who looks intently in the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it – he’ll be lessed in what he does.) When in doubt (James 1:6-8), we must buckled down and persistent in standing firm in the Lord (Excerpt from Isaiah 7:9- If you don’t stand firm in your faith, you’ll not stand at all.; 2 Cor 1:24) When faced with fears, we shouldn’t hesitate to ask for His help. After all, He is our Jehovah Shalom, the Prince of Peace. We shouldn’t be afraid for He’s always there to help us. (Lamentations 3:56-57).

Hereafter, we should also goad and fortify each other (2 Sam 22:29-31; Hebrews 10:22-24) and we should trust God even we can’t find any reason to, just like how Abraham did. ( Romans 4:18-22) Besides, we believe in Him thouh we haven’t seen Him. (Hebrews 11:1- Now, faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.)

In conclusion, we should never reckon and think that we’re alone for God’s never gonna leave us nor forsake us. On top of everything, nothing can seperate us from His unfailing love.

(Romans 8:38-39- For I am convinced that neither death or life, neither angels or demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to seperate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus, our Lord.)

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