Oh hi! It’s been a while since I had all the time in the world wherein I could like roll around social media and do anything I want under the sun. I’m err.. a bit complaining. But just wholeheartedly though, since the reason behind it was my working schedule which is predominantly opposing to my normal body clock. And I’m still pretty much in the adjusting period so please bear with me.
As much as I want to be like the unstoppable and brave girl I want to be in order for me to like excel on everything I do which will be the bridge for me, going after what I wanna be in the future, well.. there was this huge wall hindering me. I know I have to like mature, move forward and shrug off all the insecurities that the past had caused me. But there are things that tend to make me feel so little of myself. Sometimes I can’t decipher what was happening to me, really.
One of those is the (I’m not sure if I’m being selfless or stupid) fact that I tend to forgive those people who actually leave me behind like a toy he’s already sick of and thus, finds another one to play with. I know this is like so 2013! And deja vu even came into the picture. I just had my biggest heartbreak then came another one who just throw everything behind. I’m honestly sick of this disposition I’m in. What makes things worst is the fact that I feel like I’m always either the riff-off version of someone or the under rated in a certain group I’m with.
I always force myself to believe in myself and I swear, I really want to leave everything that belongs to the past, seriously. What’s hard is when deja vu kicks in and you kept on meeting people of the same kind you met in the past. Or worst, // than before! That’s why whenever mind and heart wants to take their dispute into the boxing ring, even how hard it is, don’t go where your heart is pulling you but you know deep inside you that it will sooner or later, hurt you in the long run. Go to the path where you think it’s right for you to be in.
Don’t commit the same mistake. That’s what the past 2 years have taught me to keep in mind. And maybe, we just have to accept that some people are just not meant to be with you even how much you love them to the point of holding on to your promise to each other that you will always have each other when everything’s gone and that you will be better together. My gosh, Dig by Incubus, please stop playing on and on into my head! 😦
To keep things clean, I opted to wear basic but of course, to keep things not too mundane, I incorporated my DIY denim detachable collar into my outfit for the day. In time for the this season’s fixation for denim!